Jeff introduced us to his sister-in-law, who recently ran a long-distance endurance race with a team of people. Share a time when you were part of a team, whether with sports or some other area. What was your role, which teammates do you remember, and what did you all accomplish?Jeff suggested, “People are like magnets. Some are connectors and some are repellers, and most of us are a little of both.” What do you think about that statement, and how do you see yourself? The relational skill Jeff talked about this week is the skill of seeing. Read Luke 7:11-15 together. What do you observe when you read this passage? Jeff shared a quote from David Brook’s book “How to Know a Person”: Diminishers make people feel small and unseen. They see other people as things to be used, not as persons to be befriended. They stereotype and ignore. They are so involved with themselves that other people are just not on their radar screen. Illuminators, on the other hand, have a persistent curiosity about other people. They have been trained or have trained themselves in the craft of understanding others. They know what to look for and how to ask the right questions at the right time. They shine the brightness of their care on people and make them feel bigger, deeper, respected, lit up. As you consider the four aspects of focus, generosity, curiosity, and compassion, how does Jesus’ interaction with the widow of Nain reflect that of an illuminator? When was a time that you felt seen? Maybe it was someone who saw your potential and named it or gave you an opportunity; maybe it was someone who saw your pain and cared. Maybe it was someone who saw both your present situation and how they could help you get to a better place. Or maybe it was someone who saw you and invited you to someplace like this. When was a time you were able to make someone else feel seen – when you were a connector and illuminator? Can you think of a person (or opportunity) where you can exercise the relational skill of seeing others and making them feel seen, heard, and understood? Take some time to share prayer requests and pray for one another. Going Deeper As a way to see others, here is an exercise taken from Practicing the Way - Community Practice, to help you practice listening well. You can do this in your group now or during the week. Find someone and ask them this question: “What is one thing that has been impacting you lately?” As the listener: Give the person your full attention and listen without interrupting. Avoid judging or interrupting and do not offer advice. As the person finishes, thank them for sharing and then practice active listening by attempting to paraphrase what they’ve said. You can start this by saying, “What I hear you saying is…” Remember to speak with empathy and respect. And once you finish paraphrasing, ask the person, “Is that correct?” and let them respond. At your next group meeting, you can share how this listening exercise worked for you, and if you noticed anything about how you tend to listen. Verse to mediate on this week: When the Lord saw her, his heart went out to her and he said, “Don’t cry.” (Luke 7:13)