DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
"Gentleness"
Choose the questions for your group; no pressure to use all of them.
Start Off
- When you hear the word “gentle,” what comes to mind first? Has your understanding of gentleness changed after this message?
- Who is one of the gentlest people you know, and what makes them that way?
- Jeff defined gentleness as “strength under control.” How is that different from how our culture usually defines gentleness?
Reflect on God’s Word
- Read Matthew 11:28-29. Jesus described himself as “gentle and humble at heart." What stands out to you about Jesus describing himself with those words?
- Read Colossians 3:12. Followers of Jesus are called to “clothe themselves” with gentleness daily so they can become approachable, empowering, and winsome people who reflect Christ well and draw others toward Him. Which of those three descriptions challenged you most: approachable, empowering, or winsome?
Go Deeper
- Think about your closest relationships. Where are you most likely to lose gentleness: at home, work, online, parenting, friendships, or disagreements?
- Jeff shared the example of the visiting Christian speaker at a university who was NOT gentle and humble at heart and who led Jeff to say, "it is possible to be right but not Christlike." How does that impact our mission as Jesus followers?
- How can gentleness help Christians engage difficult cultural conversations without compromising truth?
- What would change in your relationships if people consistently felt respected, listened to, and valued by you?
- Just like we clothe our bodies before leaving the house, Jeff encouraged us to “put on gentleness” daily. What are some practical habits that could help us to do that this week?
Pray
- Pray that God would help your group reflect the gentleness of Jesus; replace harshness, defensiveness, and pride with humility and love; teach each person to speak truth with grace and respect; and empower your group through the Holy Spirit to become approachable, encouraging, and winsome people.
- You may also close with this prayer: “God of gentleness, by the power of the Holy Spirit, fill us with your gentleness, so that it will overflow out of us each day and every way in the week ahead. Amen.”
VERSE TO MEDITATE ON AND MEMORIZE THIS WEEK
Blessed are the gentle, for they will inherit the earth. (Matthew 5:5, NASB)
PUT IT INTO PRACTICE (BETWEEN MEETINGS)
Day 1 — Put On Gentleness
Read Colossians 3:12. Before leaving the house each day, we intentionally put on clothes. Paul says we should intentionally “put on” character qualities too. Gentleness does not happen automatically; it is something we choose with God’s help. Before starting your day, pause and pray: “Holy Spirit, help me clothe myself with gentleness today.”
Day 2 — Learn the Gentleness of Jesus
Read Matthew 11:28-29. Jesus described himself as “gentle and humble in heart.” The most powerful person in the universe chose approachability over intimidation. Spend time with someone today without trying to impress them, correct them, or control the conversation. Focus on listening well.
Day 3 — Use Strength to Empower Others
Read Ephesians 6:4. Gentleness does not remove truth, boundaries, or correction; it changes how we deliver them. Gentle people use their strength to build others up instead of tearing them down. Encourage someone today: a child, co-worker, spouse, friend, or team member.
Speak life into who they are becoming.
Day 4 — Speak Truth Gently
Read 1 Peter 3:15-16. Christians are called to stand for truth with gentleness and respect. Our posture matters just as much as our message. Before responding in a difficult conversation, text, email, or social media interaction: pause, pray, lower your emotional intensity, and respond with humility and respect.
Day 5 — Become More Like Jesus
Read Galatians 5:22-23. Gentleness is fruit produced by the Holy Spirit, not just self-effort. As we surrender to God and practice his ways, he gradually transforms our hearts. Spend 10 minutes in silence asking God, “Where have I become harsh? Who do I need to apologize to? How can I better reflect Jesus this week?”